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Gender/sexuality

10 things I love about being non-binary

  1. I get to shop at both the men's AND women's section, which means twice as many options, which means more shopping (fun!)
  2. We are showing the world what gender can look like without boundaries and binaries. You know those gender norms/stereotypes that people feel sorta pressured to fall into? I mean the ones that stresses out all the women that work a lot, stay-at-home dads etc.? Yeah...For non-binary people, that norm barely exist. Sure, you've got the "androgynous, buzzcut your hair, skinny, white"-stereotype, but non-binary people already came out as not men/women, we can manage to not give a fuck about this gender stereotype too.
  3. There's no one-size-fits-all definition of non-binary, so I get to specifically define my own gender however I want, which is an extremely free and authoritarian experience. I get full liberty in how masculine, androgynous or feminine I want to be and how I define those things.
  4. I have a very masculine side, but also a very feminine side. I can be like "wow I don't understand women," when my female friends start going on about tiny purses. But I can also talk about my passionate obsession with romantic movies/books, something which is considered quite "girly." And I can make fun of men watching Formula 1-races, but if you've seen the way I get during soccer-anything, wow. Basically, I am masculine, feminine, anything in between that, but also none of that at all, and I think that's beautiful.
  5. The queer community is great. Okay sure, there are some gatekeeping, transphobic etc. exclusions, but in general it's great. My family hasn't always handled my queerness with as much grace as they do now, but I know that I have a whole group of queer people to fall back on. And as queers, we all go through the same big thing of not conforming to the norm, so that's something we can all relate to. Sometimes the world can feel really dark and lonely, and queers know this all too well, so they try to help a lot. So many queer people advocate for more visibility/support for people with mental health issues, and it's because of those people that I (and so many others) don't feel so alone anymore. Because we're not.
  6. Since non-binary people already don't conform to the overall gender norms, they can say "to hell with all the other norms" much more easily than cis people. We often give ourselves more freedom in exploring with other things, such as sexuality, kinks, gender expression, polyamory, clothes (some people just start making their own clothes from scratch), hobbies, whatever. At first, I wasn't all too eager to come out to myself as non-binary, since I didn't want "another thing that makes me weird/different compared to the others." But since I've come out, not just to myself, but I'm out pretty much everywhere right now, I've found that being non-binary is not this ball and chain that keeps me from being "normal" and thus accepted. Being non-binary has so far been the most freeing experience of my life. I get to be the most 'me' I've ever been in my entire life.
  7. I get to pick whichever bathroom's the cleanest/had the shortest line.
  8. Other than gender expression, pronouns are also a fun thing to toy around with. I just try different things to see what fits or feels the nicest, and I feel like the barrier to do those things is way less high for non binary people, compared to cis people.
  9. My sexuality isn't and doesn't feel fixed. I used to think I was only into girls, but ever since I've come out as non binary, my view on men and masculinity has drastically changed/been changing, and I feel like my sexuality has been more fluid and open. I feel more free to unapolagetically experiment with things and that's just a lovely feeling.
  10. Lastly, and this isn't necessarily something I like about my gender, but it still needs to be said. Learning all these things isn't excessive political correctness, it's just part of being a nice and decent person. At the end of the day, I'm not just a non binary person, I am so much more than that. I'm someone's kid, sibling, friend etc. I have hobbies and interests and quirks that have absolutely nothing to do with being non binary, because my gender doesn't define me.

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